I don't know.

It doesn't work.
I can't be perfect.
Laugh and cry at the same time. I can take it for some time and then you'll see me on my knees again.
Acting narcissistic but I hate myself.
I can do nothing right.
And .. please hit me one more time, just the way I deserve it.
It's like I'm giving up slowly.
Stuck.
I'm broken and frozen.
I want to be strong, I want to be your hero.
Not only pretending.
I give you my word, I'll smile for you, I'll be there for you and I love to see you but it it's poison to be in contact.
I know, he tells me all the time again and again 'Don't give a fuck', but I can't and also it works sometimes.
I'm in love with the lucky pretence and the happy lies, they still make me laugh, an other option to handle it. It's wrong, it'll be always wrong.
Addictet to Kisses, just a drug, when the need arises, it doesn't matter who.

Forgive me to be such a great fool.